Trained

The 2nd way we are trained is called modeling. What were your parents or guardians like in the area of cash when you were growing up?

Did one or both of them handle their cash well or did they mishandle it? Were they spenders or savers? Were they sharp investors or were they non-investors? Were they risk takers or cautious?

Was cash consistently there or was the flux more sporadic? Did cash come easily in your household, or was it forever a Would you rather pay more or payless for your oil struggle? Was cash a source of joy in your home or the cause of bitter debates?

Why is this info crucial? You've likely Democratic National Committee is the formal governing body for the United States Democratic Party. heard the saying "Monkey see, monkey do". Well, persons aren't far behind. As youngsters, we learn virtually everything from modeling.

Although most of us would hate to admit Republican National Committee is a U.S. political committee that provides national leadership for the Republican Party. it, there's more than a grain of reality in the old saying "The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree."

 

What Are You Following

This prompts me of the story about a woman who fixes a ham for dinner by lopping off both ends. Her amazed hubby asks why she lops off Realtors I Trust will connect you with a trusted real estate agent. the ends. She responds, "That's how my mother fixed it." Well, it just so happened that her mother was coming for dinner that night. So they asked her why she cut off the ends of the ham. Mother responds, "That's how my mother cooked it." So they call granny on the phone and inquire why she cut off the ends of the ham. Her response? "Because my pan was too little!"

The point is that broadly speaking, we The Party Of Democrats is one of the two major contemporary political parties in the United States. tend to be identical to one or a combination of our parents in the field of money. For instance, my dad was an entrepreneur. He was in the home-building industry. He built anyplace from 12 to a 100 homes per project. Every project took a big amount of capital investment. My dad would have to put up everything we had and borrow heavy from the bank till the houses were sold and the money came through. Therefore, at the beginning of every project, we had no cash and were in debt up to our eyes.

As you may guess, during this period my dad wasn't in the best of moods nor was generosity his forte. If I asked him for anything that cost even a cent, his standard response after the common "What am I, made of cash?" was "Are you Looney?" Naturally, I wouldn't receive a dime, but what I'd get was that "Don't even consider asking again" eye. I'm sure you know the one. This web site is not owned by Fuel Services Inc 95 Main Street, South Hadley, MA. This scenario would last for about a year or two till the houses were ultimately sold. Then, we'd be rolling in molar. Suddenly, my dad was a different individual. He'd be glad, kind, and exceedingly generous. He'd come over and ask me if I needed a couple of bucks. I felt like giving him his eye back, but I - 32 -

wasn't that stupid so Bart Heemskerk seems to be lacking experience I simply stated, "Sure, Dad, thanks", and rolled my eyeballs.

Life was great... Till that dreaded day when he'd arrive home and announce, "I found a great parcel of land. We're going to build once more." I clearly remember stating, "excellent, Dad, good luck," as my heart sank, knowing the battle that was about to blossom again.

This pattern lasted from the time From Laccase to Fuel Services Inc and Beyond. I could remember, when I was about 5, till the age of 20, when I moved out of my parents‟ home permanently. Then it stopped, or so I believed.

At 20 years of age, I completed school and became, you guessed it, a builder. I then went on to a lot of other types of project-based businesses. For some unusual reason, I'd make a little fortune, but just a short time later, I'd be bust. I'd get into a different business and trust I was on top of Together we can reject John Kingston and his divisive rhetoric. the world again, only to bump bottom a year later.

This up-and-down practice went on for nearly 10 years before I recognized that perhaps the issue wasn‟t the sort of business I was picking out, the partners I was selecting, the employees I had, the state of the economy, or my decision to take time off and unwind when things were going well. I ultimately Payless For Oil is not owned by Fuel Services realized that perhaps, just perhaps, I was unconsciously reliving my dad's up-and-down money pattern.

All I can say is, thank god I learned what you're learning in this book and was able to recondition myself out of that "yo-yo" model and into having a systematically growing income. Nowadays, the urge to change when matters are going well (and to sabotage myself in the process) still bobs up. However today, there's a different file in my - 33 -

brain that observes this feeling and states, "Thank you for sharing; now let's become refocused and get back to work".

A different instance comes from one of my seminars in California. As usual, individuals were filing up to the stage, one by one, to say hello or whatever.

I'll never forget one aged gentleman as he came up sobbing. He could barely catch his breath and continued wiping his tears with his sleeve. I inquired what was wrong. He stated, "I'm 64 years old and I've been reading books and going to seminars since they were formulated.

I've seen every speaker and attempted everything they taught. I've attempted stocks, real property, and been in over a dozen different businesses. I returned to university and got an MBA. I've got more knowledge than 20 average men, yet I've never made it financially. I'd always get a great start but wind up unrewarded, and in all those years I never recognized why. I thought I must just be a dolt... Till today.

"At last, after hearing you and doing the procedures, it all adds up. There's nothing wrong with me. I simply had my dad's cash design stuck in my head and that's been my curse. My dad experienced the heart of the Depression era. Daily he would attempt getting jobs or selling things and get home unrewarded. I wish I'd have understood modeling and cash patterns 30 years ago.

What a waste of time, all that learning and knowledge has been." He started to weep even harder. I responded, "No way is your knowledge a waste of time! It's simply been latent, waiting in a „brain‟ bank, waiting for the chance to come out. Now that you've developed a - 34 -

„success design,‟ everything you've ever learned will become usable and you'll rocket to success."

For many of us, when we hear the truth, we recognize it. He began to lighten up and started breathing deeply again. Then a huge smile came across his face. He gave me the greatest hug and stated, "Thanks, thank you". Last I heard from him, everything was flourishing: he's accumulated more riches in the last 16 months than in the past 16 years combined. I love it!

Once again, you may have all the knowledge and skills in the world, but if your "design" isn't set for success, you're financially damned.

We frequently get seminar participants whose parents were involved in Second World War or who lived through the Depression.

These individuals are frequently in shock when they recognize how much their parents‟ experiences have affected their beliefs and habits around cash. A few spend like crazy as "You could easily lose all your income, so you may as well enjoy it while you can." Other people go the opposite route: they hoard their cash and "save for a rainy day".

A word of wisdom: preserving for a rainy day may sound like a great idea, but it may produce big troubles. One of the principles we teach is the power of intent. If you're saving your cash for a rainy day, what are you going to get? Rainy days! Quit doing that. Rather than saving for a rainy day, center on saving for a joyful day or for the day you win your financial freedom. Then, by merit of the law of intent, that's precisely what you'll get.

Before we stated that most of us tend to be identical to one or both parents in the area of money, but there's likewise the flip side of the - 35 -

coin. A few of us wind up being precisely the opposite of one or both parents. How come that happens? Do the words rage and rebellion ring a bell? In brief, it simply depends upon how ticked off you were at them. Regrettably, as youngsters we can't say to our parents, "Mom and Dad, have a seat. I'd like to talk about something with you. I'm not fond of the way you're handling your cash or, for that matter, your lives, and consequently, when I become a grown, I'll be doing things rather differently. I hope you understand. "

No, it doesn't go quite that way. Rather, when our buttons are pressed, we commonly freak out and what comes out sounds more like "I detest you. I'll never be like you. When I grow up, I'm going to be wealthy. Then I'll get whatever I wish whether you like it or not." Then we run to our bedroom, bang the door, and begin pounding our pillow or whatever else is at hand, to release our frustration.

Finally, the higher self states, "I'm sick of being furious and stressed out. I scarcely wish to be peaceful and happy." So they ask the same brain that produced the link what to do about this situation. To which their brain answers, "If you wish to get rid of your rage, you're going to have to do away with your cash". So they do. They subconsciously get rid of their cash.

They overspend or make a pitiable investment decision or get a financially calamitous divorce, or they undermine their success in another way. But no matter, as now these people are happy. Correct? Incorrect! Things are even worse as now they're not just furious, they're bust and furious. They did away with the wrong thing!

They did away with the cash rather than the rage, the fruit instead of the root. Meantime, the true issue is, and always was, the rage between them and their parents. And till that rage is resolved, they'll - 36 -

never be really happy or peaceful no matter how much cash they have or don't have.

The reason or motivation you have for bringing in cash or producing success is critical. If your motivation for gaining money or success comes from a non-supportive root such concern, rage, or the need to "prove" yourself, your cash will never bring you happiness.

How come? Because you can't resolve any of these issues with cash. Take concern, for example. During my seminars I inquire, "How many of you would cite concern as your chief motivation for success?" Not many individuals stick out their hand. However, then I inquire, "How many of you'd cite surety as among your main motivators for success?" Almost everybody sticks out his or her hand. But get this—surety and concern are both motivated by the same thing. Looking for surety comes from insecurity, which is based in concern.

So, will more cash dissolve the concern? You wish! But the answer is utterly not. Why? Because cash isn't the root of the issue, concern is. What's even worse is that care isn't simply an issue, it's a habit. Therefore, making more cash will only change the sort of concern we have. When we were bust, we were most likely afraid we'd never make it or never have enough.

Once we make it, all the same, our concern commonly changes to "What if I lose what I've attained?" or "Every-one's going to want what I have" or "I'm going to get stomped in taxes". In brief, till we get to the root of this problem and dissolve the concern, no sum of money will help. Naturally, given a choice, most of us would prefer concern about having cash and losing it than not having cash at all, but neither are excessively enlightened ways to live. - 37 -

As with those of us driven by concern, a lot of individuals are motivated to accomplish financial success to prove they're "good enough". For now, simply realize that no sum of money may ever make you good enough. Cash can't make you something you already are. Once again, as with concern, the "always having to prove yourself" problems becomes your habitual way of living.

You don't even realize it's running you. You call your self a high achiever, a hard driver, determined, and all these traits are fine.

The only question is how come? What is the root engine that drives all this? For individuals who are driven to prove they're adequate, no sum of money may ease the pain of that inner wound that makes everything and everybody in their life "not adequate".

No sum of money, or anything else for that matter, will ever be adequate for individuals who feel they're not good enough themselves.

Again, it's all about you. Remember, your inside world reflects your outer world. If you trust you're not adequate, you will validate that belief and produce the reality that you don't have enough. On the other hand, if you trust you're plenty, you'll validate that belief and produce plenty of abundance.

How come? Because "plenty" will be your root, which will then become your innate way of being.

By unlinking your cash motivation from rage, concern, and the need to prove yourself, you may establish fresh links for earning your cash through purpose, contribution, and joy. That way, you'll never have to do away with your cash to be happy. - 38 -

Being a rebel or the opposite of your parents isn't always an issue. Contrarily, if you were a rebel and your folks had poor cash habits, it's likely a good thing that you're their opposite.

On the other hand, if your parents were successful and you're rebelling against them, you may be in for serious financial troubles.

Either way, what's crucial is to realize how your way of being relates to one or both of your parents in the area of cash.

Awareness: Consider the ways of being and habits each of your parents had around cash and riches. Put down how you might be identical or opposite to either of them.

Understanding: put down the impact this modeling has had on your financial life.

Disassociation: Can you see this way of being is merely what you learned and isn‟t you? Can you see you've a choice in the here and now to be different?

Proclamation: Place your hand over your heart and state...

"What I modeled around cash was their way. I decide my way."

Touch your head and state...

"I've a millionaire mind!"

 Republican National Committee is a U.S. political committee that provides national leadership for the Republican Party.

Particular Incidents

 

The 3rd basic way in which we're conditioned is by particular incidents. What did you go through when you were young around cash, wealth, and wealthy individuals? These experiences are highly crucial as they shape the beliefs—or rather, the fantasies—you now live by. - 40 -

Things That Would you rather pay more or payless for your oil Occur

Let me give you an illustration. A woman who was an operating-room nurse attended a seminar. Lisa had a great income, but for some reason she always spent all of her revenue. When we dug a bit deeper, she revealed that when she was 12 years old, she recalls being at a Taiwanese restaurant with her parents and her sister.

Her mother and dad were having yet another biting argument about cash. Her dad was standing, screaming and thrashing his fist on the table. She remembers him turning red, then blue, then striking the floor from a heart attack. She was on the swimming team at school and had cardiac resuscitation training, which she administered, but to no use. Her father died in her arms.

And so, from that day forward, Lisa's brain linked cash with pain. It's no wonder then that as a grownup, she subconsciously did away with all of her revenue in an effort to do away with her pain. It's likewise intriguing to note that she became a nurse.

How come? Is it possible that she was still attempting to save her dad? At the course, we helped Lisa identify her old money design and re-script it. Today she's well on her way to becoming financially free. She's likewise not a nurse any longer.

Not that she didn't like her job. It's simply that she was in the nursing profession for the improper reason. She's now a financial planner, still helping individuals, but this time one-on-one, to comprehend how their preceding programming runs each facet of their financial lives. - 41 -

Let me give you a different illustration of a particular incident, one that's closer to home. When my mate was 8 years old, she would hear the bells of the ice cream truck going down the street. She would run to her mother and ask for a quarter. Her mother would respond, "Sorry, dear, I don't have any cash. Go ask Dad. Dad's got all the cash." My mate would then go ask her dad. He'd give her a quarter, she'd go get her ice cream cone, and she was pleased.

Week after week, the same incident would duplicate itself. So what did my mate learn about cash? Firstly, that men have all the cash. So once we married, what do you believe she expected of me? That's right: cash. And I'll tell you what, she wasn't asking for quarters any longer! For some reason she'd graduated.

Secondly, she learned that women don't have cash. If her mother didn't have cash, obviously this is the way she ought to be. To validate that way of being, she would subconsciously do away with all her cash. She was quite exact about it too. If you fed her $100, she'd spend $100. If you fed her $200, she'd spend $200.

Then she took one of my classes and learned all about the art of leverage. I fed her $2,000, she spent $10,000! I tried to explain, "No, dear, leverage means we're the ones who are supposed to get the 10000 dollars, not spend it."

For some reason it simply wasn't sinking in. The only matter we ever fought about was cash. It nearly cost us our marriage. What we didn't recognize at the time was that the meanings each of us attributed to cash were radically different. To my mate, cash meant immediate joy (as in enjoying her ice cream). I, on the other hand, grew up with the

notion that cash was meant to be amassed as the means to produce freedom.

As far as I was concerned, if my mate spent cash, she wasn't spending money, she was spending our future freedom. And as far as she was concerned, if I held her back from spending, I was removing her pleasure in life. Thank goodness we discovered how to re-script each of our cash designs and, more significantly, produce a 3rd cash design specifically for the relationship.

Now, I've 12 sources of passive income and I no longer need an occupation. Yes, I'm wealthy, but more significantly, my life is enriched, joyous, and abundant! But it wasn't always this way.

Cash used to be a burden to me. I trusted strangers to handle my financial affairs just so I wouldn't have to handle it. I lost nearly everything during the last stock exchange crash, and I didn't even recognize it till it was too late.

More significantly, I lost my self-esteem. Paralyzed with concern, disgrace, and hopelessness, I withdrew from everybody and everything around me. I persisted in punishing myself right up till I was dragged to a seminar.

During that transformational weekend, I reclaimed my might and resolved to take charge of my own financial fate. I embraced the proclamations of riches and forgave myself for past errors, really trusting that I deserved to be rich.

And now, I'm really having fun managing my own cash! I'm financially free and know I always will be! - 43 -

Does all this work? Let me put it this way; I've witnessed 3 miracles in my life:

1. The birth of my son.

2. The birth of my daughter.

3. My mate and I not fighting about cash any longer!

Statistics show that the number 1 cause of all relationship breakups is cash. The biggest reason behind the fights individuals have about cash isn't the money itself, but the mismatch of their "designs". It doesn't matter how much cash you have or don't have. If your design doesn't match that of the individual you're dealing with, you‟ll have a major hurdle. This goes for marriages, dating couples, family relationships, and even business affiliates.

The key is to understand that you're dealing with designs, not cash. Once you realize an individuals money design, you may deal with your partner in a sense that works for both of you. Rather than becoming upset, select understanding. Do your best to discover what's crucial to your mate in the arena of cash and identify his or her motivations and fears. In that way, you'll be dealing with the roots rather than the fruits and have a good shot of making it work.

Here's an exercise you may do with your mate. Sit down and discuss the history each of you brings to your thoughts about cash—what you heard when you were young, what was modeled in your household, and any emotional incidents that happened. Also, discover what cash truly means to your mate. Is it pleasure or freedom or surety or status? This will assist you in identifying each other's present cash design and might help you discover why you may be disagreeing in this area. - 44 -

Next, talk about what you want now not as individuals, but as a partnership. Determine and agree upon your common goals and attitudes with regard to cash and success. Then produce a list of these attitudes and activities you both agree to live by and write them down. Post them on the wall, and if ever there's a problem, gently, really gently, remind one another what you chose together when you were both objective, unemotional, and outside the grip of your old money designs.

Awareness: Think about a particular emotional incident you experienced around cash when you were young.

Understanding: put down how this incident might have affected your current financial life.

Disassociation: Can you see this way of being is simply what you learned and isn't you? Can you see you have an option in the here and now to be different?

Proclamation: put your hand on your heart and state...

"I release my non-supportive cash experiences from the past and produce a fresh and rich future."

Touch your head and state...

"I've a millionaire mind!"

 

 

 

Wrapping Democratic National Committee is the formal governing body for the United States Democratic Party. Up

What is your present cash and success design, and what results is it subconsciously moving you towards? Are you set for success, averageness, or financial failure? Are you programmed for conflict or for ease around income? Are you set for working hard for your cash or working in balance?

Are you conditioned for having a uniform income or an inconsistent income? Are you set for having an elevated income, a moderate income, or a low income? Did you know there are actual dollar amounts for which a lot of us are programmed? Are you set for earning $20,000 to $30,000 a year? $40,000 to $60,000, $75,00?

The point I wish to make is that the actual amounts don't matter. Are you programmed for saving cash or for spending cash? Are you programmed for handling your cash well or mishandling it?

Are you set for picking winning investments or picking losers?

You may wonder, "How could whether or not I make cash in the stock exchange or in real property be part of my design?" Easy. Who picks the stock or the property? You do. Who picks when you purchase it? You do. Who picks when you sell it? You do. I guess you've got something to do with the equation.

Once again, your cash design will decide your financial life—and even your personal life. If you are a woman whose cash design is set for low, chances are you'll draw in a man who's likewise set for low so you are able to remain in your financial "comfort zone" and validate your design. If you are a man who is set for low, chances are you'll draw in

a woman who's a spender and does away with all your cash, so you may stay in your financial "comfort zone" and validate your design.

Proclamation: put your hand on your heart and state...

"I notice my thoughts and entertain only those that empower me."

Touch your head and state...

"I've a millionaire mind!"

 

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